Common goals must be set at the beginning of your treatment. They must have high priority in your life. This includes, but is not limited to, the goals of understanding yourself as you have become, finding the reasons for your deviant behavior and coming to the conclusion that without Christ in your life, you will probably never be able to conquer those behavioral patterns.

You need to have the determination to meet the obligations of this program and make it work for you, whether working in group therapy or by yourself.

You must to ask God to help establish in you an appreciative regard for others. Bear in mind that you also need to develop empathy for your victims. Ask yourself, "How were they affected by my criminal act against them? - What were they feeling and what trauma have I established in their intellect as a result of my deviant behavior?"

Once you begin to take a close look at your past actions, you will see that it is impossible to get a healthy attitude without the help of Christ. Trying to decide, by ones-self, which are the most important steps to use for recovery is not easy. Because of this there is a need to develop an understanding and an eagerness to accept help from family, friends and from counselors alike. It has been stated before, but bears repeating; If working alone, it is important to have someone you know, who is willing to confront and return the type of feedback that you will need. This helps you become the person you are striving to be. If working with a group, there will be times when you will need to confront others or be confronted for being deceitful or not sharing true feelings. Many times personal desires can and will hinder the working of a group program. It is hard to determine that the person in question is holding back something. He may be just trying to feed the group a line of deceitful confusion, hoping that they will accept what is being said. The group personnel need to understand that in every situation possible, they must manage and control motivations, demeanor and emotions.

They must remember that self-growth requires change and painful disclosures of their past sinful experiences. This means that there must be a willingness to discuss the feelings you were having while committing our crime(s), what type of fantasies you were having prior to and after the commission of the crime(s) and personal feelings about your participation in the crime(s). It is not easy to talk about these horrendous actions, but it is absolutely necessary if you are going to advance in your progress throughout the program.

You might ask, why is it necessary to confess my faults to another person? James 5:16


Reading and written assignments are two of the most important ways of finding out about yourself. These methods allow you to benefit from the experiences of others. As these methods of therapy become natural, you will begin to use everything that you have gained through the reading process. You must then apply it to yourself as you answer the questions or write out the suggested Bible verses. As you continue to use these methods, you will begin to find that God's word is very clear about your sinful nature and that it is also very clear about the remedy. You will begin to see that God does indeed speak through the prophets of the Bible and also through those with whom you become associated with for the remainder of your life.

Ask the Holy Spirit to help you recall those painful memories in order to deal with them. This can, at times, be a very traumatic part of the recovery process. It is however, a most important step if you want to become a healthy member of society. Be assured that the Holy Spirit will never put more on you than you can bear.

Finally you must choose, with the help of Christ, never to offend again.

7. List problem area(s) that I must work on.

8. Define the goal I want to achieve to overcome my problem(s).

9. On a separate sheet of paper, write out my plan of action including the following:
___________* a. Why did I choose this method?

___________* b. How I think it will help the problem area(s)

Many problems in your life relate to others. Often these problems are tied together forming a cycle of behavior. For example: A feeling of uselessness leads to a feeling of inadequacy, which in turn leads to a feeling of hopelessness. This might be resembled figure #5

10. Illustrate two cycles of behavior for myself.
________a.

________b.

11. Explain how these cycles relate to the goals I have established for myself.
________a.

________b.

A jigsaw puzzle is a complete picture that has been cut up into many pieces, mixed up and spread in disarray over the surface where reconstruction is to take place. The most exasperating moment is when you have come near to completion of the puzzle, only to find that the main piece, right in the center is missing. The whole of life is just like that jigsaw puzzle. You can live it any way you desire. Without Christ in the center of everything you do however, the puzzle of life will never be complete. The most important piece of your life is missing. That piece is a meaningful relationship with Jesus Christ.

As treatment begins, you may feel a compulsion to deny that there is really any problems. If this is done however, it is possible that you will begin seeing yourself as the victim rather than the victimizer. You may tend to make excuses for your actions to others in the program, with the same type of depraved thinking that was responsible for your commission of the sinful acts you were guilty of.

All of your problems come from one basic source, a sinful nature. The fact is that you have been allowing Satan's evil forces to direct your behavior.

Answer the following questions and direct them to yourself:
12. What does the Bible have to say about my sinful nature?
Psalm 51:5

It is difficult to separate these problems because they are all related in one form or another. When you separate them you fail to see their relationship. You will tend to put each one into its own little box, thus isolating them. This could cause a thinking that there are no problems or that they are more minuscule than they truly are. In dealing with compulsive deviant behavior, the wisdom of men is incomplete. The advice of a counselor or therapy group cannot help if you are unable or unwilling to fight against the besetting deviancy. This is why the wisdom of man must be coupled to the wisdom and power of God.

Once you come to the realization that you need help, you will find that your demeanor toward change will more likely occur. You will begin to have a healthier outlook on your problems. This, in turn, will instill an increased positive attitude, allowing you to become more open to treatment. You will then be able to listen to others when they confront you. This can only be done however, when you keep ourself in perfect peace as you keep your mind on Christ. (Ref Isa 26:3.) At this point you can agree with the Apostle Paul that you are not going to be conformed to the image of this world, but that you are rather going to be transformed by the renewing of your mind so that you may prove to yourself and others that what you want for yourself is the good and acceptable and perfect will of God. (Ref. Romans 12:2)

The time will come when you will begin to see that each of your problems, as well as good traits, are a very intricate part of the profile that must dealt with. This is only possible however, when you present yourself to God and allow him to create in you the clean heart and spirit needed to combat the addictive process in your life. Ref. Psalm 51:10)

Do not try to rush through the treatment process. To do so would be defeating the very purpose of it. You will never know what has caused past problems unless you are willing to work prayerfully, and slowly through your treatment program. You must ask God for the wisdom and the desire to begin living above your present situations.

13. List any illicit sexual activities that may have been perpetrated against me.

14. Make a list of traits relating to me as an adult.

15. How do those feelings listed above relate to my cycle of behavior?
James 3:13

It is important to temper any treatment program with the Word of God. When you begin to use it as reference material for your lifestyle, you will see what God's purpose for your life really is.

16. What should I ask of God for myself?
Psalm 143:10, 11

17. What then should my answer to the preceding verse be?
Psalm 119:106

Make a Resolve today to let God become the
controlling factor in your life.